


After the darkest night comes...

by NeedMoreCoffee



Category: Until Dawn
Genre: Angst, Blood, Cannibalism, Depression, Drama, Drugs, F/F, F/M, Gore, Horror, LGBTQ Themes, M/M, OCs - Freeform, Until Dawn - Freeform, Wendigo Josh Washington, Wendigo!Josh, chris is sad, idk - Freeform, mental health, mentions of drinking, ocs are mostly family, thats mostly it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-22
Updated: 2018-06-11
Packaged: 2019-04-05 15:15:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 16,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14047038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeedMoreCoffee/pseuds/NeedMoreCoffee
Summary: What happened to the teens after the incident on the mountain? What happened to Josh Washington? This until dawn story is going to follow the events of what happened after the mountain incident and how they all recovered. It will mostly follow Chris and his daily life, but I will include chapters with all the teenagers throughout the story. Please enjoy and stay alarmed by the tags, as this story involves a lot of explicit themes!Psstt! I might change the title if I can come up with something better. Suggestions would be welcome~





	1. Introduction

**Author's Note:**

> Hello and welcome to this story! As you've probably noticed by the tags this story is going involve a lot of gore and violence, as well angst and mentions of mental health. If you don't like these themes, then leaving now would be a good idea. For everyone else, welcome! 
> 
> This first chapter is going to be a little more intense than the others, but fear not, there shall be plenty of drama and horror to enjoy. Also keep in mind that I am definitely not a doctor and don't actually know in detail how the muscles in our body works, so uh... yeah you'll get it at the end.. 
> 
> Have fun reading!

  _Death, I come to take the soul_  
_Leave the body and leave it cold_  
_To drop the flesh off of the frame_  
_The earth and worms both have a claim_

 _Oh Death,_  
_Whoa, death!_  
_Won't you spare me over 'til another year?_

_\- Ralph Stanley, "O death"_

 

It’s the result of stepping on something as stupid as a fucking twig that has him running around in the woods. And it’s not just the snow hitting him in the eye or the wendigo closing in too fast that has him thinking he might as well drop down and give in, but it’s the hopeless feeling he’s getting when he no longer can see where he is running. Or where Josh is... He had been ahead of him only seconds ago, but then he had heard him scream and suddenly things had gone quiet. 

He curses under his breath when a branch hits him in the face, causing him to fall slightly back. He knows he has lost Josh minutes ago and that if he just continues he’s just going to get himself lost, but it’s not as if he can head back anyway. He hears the scream of the wendigo, but before he manages to turn his head to look; the ground under him collapses. He falls down, crashing into several things before his body hits solid ground. He lands with an "oof" and struggles to get back up, an awful shock of pain travels up his spine and he's pretty sure something has been damaged. Luckily the fall wasn’t too long and he is finally safe from the wendigo from above, well, so he thinks anyway.

He tries grabbing for the gun he had been carrying earlier, but it’s far too dark around him and he can’t find it. Judging by his current luck he probably dropped it in the fall.

Tumbling through the darkness of the cave like halls he just finds himself helplessly lost. It’s not like he can turn around or take a different direction, it’s just the dark tunnel before him and nothing else. As the minutes pass he begins to wonder if there even is an end to this darkness or if it will just continue, maybe he’s already dead and this is his hell?

His theory is confirmed wrong as he finally reaches the end of the tunnel, now finding himself at some clearing. The slightest source of light is a hole in the roof where the moonlight hits in, lightening up the room. This is also where several other tunnels connects and gives off the hint that miners have been around a long time ago. Chris shivers when he walks inside the room and it’s definitely not because he’s cold.

He studies the different passages and is just about to pick the one that seems lightest and might actually lead him to a safer place, when he hears the screeching sound of the wendigo not far behind. By the sound he can tell it’s not the same one from before, but he doesn’t stick around to find out. He hurries towards the way he had kept his eyes on, making turns and jumps in random as he hears the creature coming closer. It doesn’t help that he runs as fast as he possibly can do, because soon the wendigo is literally breathing him down the neck. It doesn’t grab him from behind however, but crawls along the top of the cave wall in a swift motion and comes up in front of Chris. This one is bigger than, and not as nasty as the others; he guesses that has to be the one the stranger had talked about, the one that grabbed Josh. Chris freezes as his eyes meet with the wendigo's and he stays like that, waiting for its claws to sink into him. It never does. Instead it eyes him carefully. Chris wonders if he should make a break for it, but can’t really bring himself to move. That’s when he notices something on the wendigo’s shoulder. It’s a butterfly tattoo that is far too much like Hannah’s to just be a coincidence. He swallows nervously and looks up at the creature’s face; somehow it seems softer when he does that.

“Hannah?” He asks, ignoring the lump in his throat or the way his voice sounds more like a whimper.

The wendigo doesn’t say anything, not that he really expected it would do that, but growls lowly and picks up Chris, throwing him over its shoulder. He doesn’t really try to resist, but makes a sound of resistance and attempts to get back on the ground, something that becomes impossible when Hannah begins to move.

The ride doesn’t last that long, but it’s enough to make Chris feel sick by all the running on walls and jumping here and there, definitely something he won’t return to once he gets off. Out of nowhere walls seem to fall apart around them. There is a loud sound of something crushing the roof down on them, making it nearly impossible for Hannah to push her way through, she manages but drops Chris just as they make it out of the collapse.

He tries to grab on to something as he falls, and almost manages to grab what feels like a loose rock under his fingertips. Unfortunately his fingers slip and he continues to fall, it's still so far down to the ground that when he lands the air is knocked out of him and then suddenly everything is just darkness around him.

-

Chris opens his eyes only to experience a massive pain in his head. He rubs his scalp and attempts to push himself up from wherever he is, something that proves difficult when a pain in his rib pushes him back down. Great, he had always wanted to know how it felt to break a rib.

A light from above hits him right in the eye and he looks up at the large hole that has formed in the roof since he fell. Confused he attempts to push himself up again. This time he succeeds and tries very hard to ignore the pain in his body. The light from above reveals that it’s day so he must have been blacked out for quite some time. The only question is how long..

Eventually Chris finds himself a path and tries making his way despite his injuries, if he’s been here for this long then who knows where his friends are now. He thinks about Ashley and tries very hard not to imagine images of her dead body somewhere ahead of him.

“She’s fine, they’re all fine. They have to be...” he mumbles to himself, and almost believes it.

Again he wanders aimlessly around in tunnels upon tunnels until again he is deep inside the mines. The caves start to have a more wooden layout that seems to be leading separate places at this point, Chris just feels more lost. At this point he isn’t even sure if he should keep looking for Josh or find out how to get out from this labyrinth. In the end, his minds sets for both.

Soon Chris finds his way into an open room that stretches out far, its cave like but has the same wooden work from before. There’s water stretching around the place, luckily it doesn’t prevent him from moving on. The sounds of something or someone further inside the open space has him alerted, judging by the sound of it however it definitely can’t be another wendigo.

“Hello?” He tries calling out, his voice weaker than he wants it to be.

He tries moving further in and by the sound of it; he is closing in on whatever is in front of him.

“Josh?” He tries, hoping for the best when a figure appears in front of him.

By every step he takes he can see the person better. He seems to be standing with his back turned to him and soon, Chris recognizes who's back.

“Josh” He exclaims relieved. Quickly he moves towards the other, however his smile quickly fades and he stops not too far from the other. There is something alarming by the way Josh is standing; crouched up and seeming to be very busy with something. He doesn’t react to Chris’s voice and when he is close enough he can hear the sounds; their strange and animal like, like a predator gnawing on the flesh of its meal. There’s also the smell that has him covering his nose as he still continues to move forward. 

“Josh, bro, you alright?” He reaches out to touch Josh’s shoulder, still unable to see what the other is crouched over. 

Josh suddenly stops moving and Chris freezes, his hand hovering just above his shoulder. Something drops from Josh’s hands and rolls around to hit Chris’s feet, when he looks down he pulls away from Josh in shock and disgust. His stomach turns and a sickening feeling is going through him at what lays at his feet. A head is rolling just below his feet, or at this point it’s more like a skull. Most of the flesh has been gnawed off, leaving nothing more than some remaining flesh and hairs sticking to different sides. Although it's completely disgusting to him, Chris can't help but feel relieved that he can't recognize who's head this is. 

Then his attention turns to Josh.

“Shit” he mutters and backs away when Josh begins to move again. Slowly he watches as Josh turns to face him.

His face is what comes to attention first. It still looks like Josh, only it definitely isn’t Josh anymore. His mouth looks torn open, with sharp teeth sitting unnaturally on the side. He’s got several cuts on his face that Chris doesn’t remember either him or Mike having caused. Josh’s eyes are also different, with a white hollow sort of glow to them; it reminds him of what the stranger had told him.

It’s strange but Chris doesn’t feel afraid when Josh moves closer to him, low growls attempting to threaten him, he just feels sad. So he doesn’t speak when Josh approaches him, doesn’t move when Josh is up in his face seeming to smell him and doesn’t fight when he feels himself being grabbed by Josh’s still smaller arms. It’s not until he feels claws digging into his skin he actually reacts. He pushes Josh off and again backs away from the other, it has Josh sneering at him, like an angry cat, and he again he jumps Chris. Chris tries to struggle, but with a broken rib and a stronger person on top of him it becomes too much of a struggle, soon Josh has him pushed up against a wall. And it hurts so much when the hard surface presses against his cuts and bruises, that Chris can't help but let out a light whimper. Again Josh leans in towards Chris and takes in his scent.

“Wha..?” Chris attempts to speak but quickly closes his mouth when Josh pushes himself up and pulls him along. Josh has Chris’s arm securely wrapped in his own hand, pulling him along further away from where Chris came from and into some dark place. He lets himself be pulled along, unsure of what is going on. For sure Josh isn’t himself at this point; he’s got that wendigo spirit in him. He knows however, that this is not the action of a wendigo, so maybe this is what they're like when they haven’t completely turned? Does that mean it’s not too late?

Suddenly Josh stops and Chris struggles not to bump into him from the sudden end of movement. As gentle as it’s possible for someone with large claws and a growing strength Josh places Chris on a chair he hasn’t even realized is there. He sits down a bit awkwardly and watches carefully as Josh begins to move around him.

“So this has been very uhm, nice, but Josh if you can hear me in there I think I’d really like to find a way to get out of here”

And then Josh is on him again, this time folding a hand around his face from behind, nails cutting skin as if they were tiny daggers. Chris makes a small hiss and tries his best not to struggle, afraid of what this version of Josh is capable of.

“Dude” he tries again and is this time silenced by Josh’s tongue on his neck, which causes a surprised release of air from Chris. He gulps and becomes very tense, unsure what exactly this is. Awareness begins to kick in when his head is leaned slightly to the side and his dozens of layers of clothes are pushed back.

Panic begins to rise in him when Josh leans in, his teeth scraping against the sensitive skin. Chris's breath hitches again and he is completely frozen in place, too scared to move.

He feels sharp teeth sink deep into the skin between his neck and shoulder, making a sickening sound as they scrape against bone. They clench around a piece there and slowly begin to tear through muscles and tendons. Everything Chris can do is clench his teeth together and try to take the pain, and through it all, he can’t help but think this is what he deserves.

There is another sick sound before it’s over, something that reminds Chris of the sound that comes when you tear a chicken wing apart. It’s also the worse part, when he feels parts of his own body being torn off of him. That's when he can't take it anymore, and an awful scream rings through the empty caves. When it’s over Josh pushes away from him, leaving him leaned against the chair in utter shock of what has just happened. At first his head just droops to the ground, until consciousness takes hold of him again. He gazes down at the open wound on his shoulder and has to hold himself back from throwing up right there. There's really too much blood to really see it, but he can just barely make out the bone from his collarbone. Chris has to focus on not throwing up again before he can look away again. He looks back at Josh who has moved further behind him and is still chewing on the piece in his mouth. Chris takes it as a chance to get away and rushes up on his feet, he doesn’t even look behind him when he hears Josh growl. He makes a choice to run through a corridor and notices how they’re no longer cave like, but more like brick walls.

“He’s not Josh, He’s not Josh” he tries telling himself as he continues running, hoping to soon reach some end of whatever tunnel he’s gotten himself into. His hand is trying to cover up the wound at the same time, but his clothes are already coated in red and his body is feeling weaker by every step he takes. Soon, a light finally appears at the top of a stairwell at the end of the tunnel.

The sound of Josh closing in has him quickening his running as much as it’s possible. The hand that is trying desperately to cover the wound is full of his own blood, and he tries very hard to ignore the fact that his hand comes in contact with bone and torn open flesh. Soon he can’t run anymore and nearly collapses against a wall. He supports himself against it and tries catching his breath as he waits for Josh.

“He’s not Josh” He repeats, this time louder and calmer. Slowly he turns around to meet the other, who has now stopped not far from Chris. Their eyes meet.

Chris breathes in and slowly lets the air go before he starts to move towards Josh. He allows the panic that previously filled him go, realizing his defeat.

“I can’t move anymore, I have a broken rib, several bruises and I’m pretty sure something else is messed up after all that falling. I’m losing too much blood and soon I’m probably going to lose consciousness and then you can do whatever you want with me” He’s surprised by how calm his voice is in that moment.

“I don’t know if you’re still in there, probably not because of all things Josh would never do something like that. He is my best friend…” He stops when he’s not far from Josh and stares him dead in the eye.

“And I failed him” His voice cracks a little as the words leave his mouth and he has to bite down on his lower lip to keep himself from letting out a sob.

When the wendigo doesn’t seem to be doing anything he wonders if maybe Josh can hear him in there.

“I just want my best friend back” He speaks, this time not bothering with his voice and let’s tears well up in his eyes.

“Please, Josh” His arms comes to touch either side of Josh’s shoulder and he shakes the other gently.

Josh still doesn’t say or do anything; however Chris is certain he can see a familiar glint in his eyes.

"Come on man... snap out of it!" 

He attempts to shake Josh again and by now hot tears run down his cheeks. Chris feels so weak now the only thing keeping him up is Josh. He can't bring himself to speak anymore so he just throws his arms around the other, clinging to him as the weight in his body begins to pull them both down. Everything turns black, but as Chris falls into the world of unconsciousness he is almost certain he can hear the faint shouting of his name. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well... there you go... Sorry about that.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed reading! A new chapter should be up very soon~ 
> 
> Peace out!


	2. Back from the mountains

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s not the way he imagines it is supposed to be when he wakes up in the hospital. Sure there are the typical plain white walls and the several types of machines standing around doing absolutely nothing. There’s also the familiar faces of his parents and younger sister that gives him the warmest feeling. What isn’t there that he thought would be is relief, relief that he is down from that hell and here, safe and sound.

 

 _"Even the_ _darkest night will end and the sun will rise"_  

 _-Victor Hugo, Les_ _miserables_  

 

It’s not the way he imagines it is supposed to be when he wakes up in the hospital. Sure there are the typical plain white walls and the several types of machines standing around doing absolutely nothing. There’s also the familiar faces of his parents and younger sister that gives him the warmest feeling. What isn’t there that he thought would be is relief, relief that he is down from that hell and here, safe and sound.  

The first questions that comes to mind are the how’s and what’s; How did he get here? What happened? How did they find him? 

“They sent a search team up after you as quickly as they could” His mother moves her hand softly through his hair as she explains.  

And then Chris remembers.  

“Josh!” He exclaims and watches as his mother’s face turns saddened. “What happened to Josh? Is he here? Is he okay?” The questions keep coming and his mother has to hold a hand up to make him stop. 

“Josh was the one who pulled you out of the caves; they found the two of you half frozen to death by the sanatorium.” Her eyes well up and she begins to laugh quietly, her hand falls over his and she squeezes it so tight it almost hurts. Chris swears he has never seen her so emotional and soft in his entire life.  

“Is he okay?” He asks, swallowing a lump in his throat as he squeezes her hand back.  

She nods but her glance gives it away. 

“Mom” he warns, needing to know the truth. 

“He’s in a room by himself and the doctors are looking at him, he’s not as injured as you were and he quickly woke up but he’s not responding to anyone who has been trying to talk to him. And his face Chris it’s…”  

Chris attempts to hug her, but finds his arms wrapped up in bandage upon bandage and then strapped up so that it is supported against the bedside. He tries not to mind it and pulls her close with his free arm instead and she clings to him. She doesn’t really cry, because crying isn’t optional for her but it’s still far beyond their usual intimacy. He knows it’s not just about him having worried her, or that he’s okay now and she just needs to reassure herself that he’s still going to be there if she closes her eyes, but it’s about Josh as well. To her he is just like another son, someone who has been in their lives so long it’s hard to imagine him not being there. His stepdad and step sister eventually join them in the room again, having left before Chris woke up and they all sort of end up in one large hug. It’s so strange and so amazing to Chris that he nearly forgets that everything in his body hurts. 

They stay with him for a while and hold his hand when the doctors come around to explain his and his friend’s situation. Chris and Josh got back down after three whole days after the others, and since then Chris has been out cold for two days.  

It's a shock to Chris to hear that, because as far as he is concerned the incident on the mountain happened only hours ago. He doesn't voice this to anyone though and decides it's probably a better idea to just leave it for now. Besides, if he doesn't remember what happened those days he apparently spent up there, then he doesn't really want to know either...  

 _Jessica, Emily and Mike had been the most injured due to a lot of broken bones and other things, and so far, only Mike had been released. Ashley hadn’t been too badly injured except for the black eye Josh gave her and a few scratches. Sam and Matt hadn’t been too injured either, just a few scratches and bruises. The important thing was that they were getting better. And even more importantly to Chris, alive._  

 _When it came to Chris’s situation things were a bit different. He had been quickly taken care of when they had retrieved him, but his shoulder had been highly damaged. Since muscles and tendons had been torn off he had been dangerously close to losing the connection between muscles in his shoulder, which in worst case scenario could leave him with no feeling of control in his left arm. The doctors had been able to save him by building the muscle and tendons back up with the little that remained, however it would leave quite the mark once it had healed. It would also take a lot of training to rebuild the broken parts, all in good time. His broken ribs also needed healing and the several scratches had to be fixed up._  

 _“When the wounds heal they will leave scars and there is nothing anyone can do with that, they may disappear, but in your_ _case, you_ _just have to prepare being able to live with it” They had told him._  

Eventually his family leaves when the doctors tell them Chris needs to sleep and even if he really doesn’t want to, he soon drifts off anyway. 

- 

It’s late when he is woken up by a nurse who informs him he needs to get something to eat. Hunger isn’t really the first thing he can think of that he needs to do, but he doesn’t argue. She explains when she returns with the food that visiting hours are over and that’s why his family isn’t around. 

She smiles softly at Chris and sits down on a chair by his bed. 

“Not to be rude or anything, but do you actually have to stay here?” Chris asks, not really liking the thought of her sitting there and watching him eat. 

She looks slightly offended by the questions but smiles anyway.  

“It’s to make sure you actually eat what we give you” She explains and Chris nods, feeling like he might actually shout at her if she continues to glare like that. But then she looks away and he feels a little bad, she’s just doing her job. 

On the plate before him is a bowl of tomato soup and some bread. He takes the bread and takes a few bites, not really feeling any better when he has swallowed down a few pieces.  

“Can I ask you something?”  

She looks up at him and nods. 

“Sure”  

“Tomorrow, are there going to be a lot of people asking me what happened?” He stares down at his food and grabs the spoon to the soup only to move it around in the substance. 

“Probably, your situation is pretty special and your friends didn’t seem to make much sense to the police”  

Chris chuckles. “Yeah not really a surprise there”  

“Can I ask you something then?”  

Chris looks at her and nods.  

“What happened on that mountain?”  

He thinks for a while, trying to wrap his mind around what actually happened up there. 

“What we deserved” he eventually says, in a voice barely above a whisper. He doesn’t look away until she seems uncomfortable enough to want to leave.   

The nurse leaves shortly after and doesn’t comment when she sees that Chris has barely eaten anything.  

- 

He spends the next few days in the hospital doing pretty much nothing. He isn’t allowed to see Josh, something he insists on every time he gets a chance. The doctors only shake their heads at him and explain that Josh is too out of it to recognize anyone and adds that Chris shouldn’t be out of bed anyway. He hates that, it’s just his shoulder not his feet, he knows how to fucking walk. On the third day he tells the doctor exactly that and earns a heavy sigh. He does allow Chris to see the others though, another thing he doesn’t quite understand he hasn’t been allowed to do yet.  

“All in good time” is all he has been hearing ever since he woke up in this place.  

They place him in a wheelchair, insisting that he should let his arm and shoulder rest in. Chris doesn’t argue but despises the wounded look their giving him.  

The rest of the group are all meeting at the hospital today, to see each other as well as Chris. They are gathered in a room together when Chris is brought over and look fairly good. Sam, Matt and Ashley only have small bandages around some of the scratches and wounds and Ashley’s bruise looks much better. Mike still has his missing fingers wrapped in bandage, but at least it's not covered in blood anymore. Emily and Jessica look worse, they’re wrapped up in bandage here and there from deeper wounds that probably is going to leave big scars, not to mention they are still forced to wear hospital clothes. It takes away the defensive bitch look they always carry around and makes them seem more vulnerable. 

Ashley is the first one to get up from where she is sitting. They roll Chris up in front of them and leaves shortly after. He attempts to smile, but it comes out more like a grimace.  

It’s strange to be sitting in front of them like that, wrapped up in bandages upon bandages and hooked on pain killers.  

They seem to be staring at him in shock, like they actually can’t believe that he’s there, alive. And neither one of them says anything until a couple of seconds has passed and Mike seems to be the only one not staring at Chris’s shoulder like they know exactly what has happened. 

“Dude, you look like shit” He comments and Chris can’t help but let out a snicker. 

“You guys don’t look much better”  

They seem to fall into a calm chatter after that, the conversations concerning what happened to either of them and how they managed to survive the hell they went through, for some reason, none of them mentions Josh.  

Ashley is sitting next to Chris, holding his hand and caressing it softly as she speaks. It doesn't feel weird or out of place, it's just nice. 

“So dude” Matt suddenly looks over at Chris. “I know we’re all thinking about it so I’m just going to ask, what exactly happened with you and Josh?”  

It’s the question Chris had been hoping to avoid, not just because thinking about it gives him a headache, but because he hasn’t seen Josh since then and it makes him sick with worry. 

“I haven’t really been able to go through it in my own head yet” He lies and Matt nods understandingly. In all honesty, Chris has been going through the whole thing a thousand times in his head, but he isn’t ready to put it into words just yet. If anything, he prefers never to have to do that. 

“You know what” When the room seems to fall quiet Jessica opens her mouth. 

“Shit went down and we’re all pretty fucked up after everything, but hey we’re alive, right? So maybe we should just change the subject to, I don’t know, normal teenage bullshit?” Not even Emily disagrees at the suggestion and soon their chatter seems less tense, it’s comfortable and almost reminds Chris of how they used to be. They talk about school and what collages they have applied or are going to apply to. Even if Chris smiles and genuinely feels much better, there’s still that bug on the back of mind reminding him of who is missing in the group. 

An hour passes and soon Ashley, Sam, Mike and Matt have to go home. Emily and Jessica return back to their rooms leaving Chris on his own. The tension between Emily and Jessica is still kind of tense even after all that has happened and Chris prefers not to be caught in between. The doctors soon fetch him and roll him back to his room where he spends the rest of the day remembering dark caves and the stench of blood.  

- 

That night he wakes up from a nightmare, panting heavily and his forehead coated in sweat. 

 _In the nightmare he had found himself back on the mountain tied to a wall, in front of him had wendigo Josh been. He had been trying to get away when he had looked down only to realize the lower part of his body was no longer attached to_ _him but_ _was in a bundle of blood and organs that had dropped out beneath him. In horror he had shouted and finally found himself awake in the hospital bed, happy to find everything still attached._  

Outside it’s raining heavily, making the room feel even more empty than it already is. 

He tries to lie back in the bed to sleep, but after several minutes of not even being able to, he gives up. The doctors have given him a clear message to try and sleep as much as he can but if he absolutely has to, he is allowed to call them. He does that and soon a nurse turns up and helps him into the still unnecessary chair. She rolls him into the common room, where a few others are sitting. He notices Emily by the window at the end of the room and asks to be moved there. 

“You couldn’t sleep either?”  

When Emily hears him it’s almost like she’s just returned from deep inside her mind. She turns to him and gives a short smile. 

“This is actually my third night…”  

The nurse whispers to Chris that she’ll return soon and then leaves quietly. Emily watches her leave before she continues talking. 

“I just keep having these horrible nightmares, I can’t stand them… I only sleep when the doctors sneak sleeping pills into my meals”  

Chris makes a grimace. “They do that to you too, huh?” 

“They say it’s supposed to help, the sleep, but I just feel more exhausted when I wake up” Chris doesn’t notice it before now but ever since he’s seen her she’s been covering her shoulder with her hand, where a bandage is strapped around. 

“At least the pills doesn’t cause the nightmares, they don’t seem to come at day time”  

Emily nods and they stay quiet for some time. Chris settles on watching the view from the window they're sitting by. The room itself is dark but is lit up by the lights from the city outside. The rain outside is still pouring and for a moment it’s the only sound anyone can hear. 

“Have you looked at it yet?” Emily eventually asks, nodding at Chris’s bandaged shoulder.  

He shakes his head and realizes he hasn’t really thought much about it; despite the fact that it itches like hell and that it is a damn bother every time he tries to do anything at all, which isn’t much. He doesn’t mind it that much.  

“It’s not as bad as it looks either” That is probably a lie; the bite had almost cost him his whole arm. 

Emily makes a face that indicates she doesn’t really believe him and he smiles, she could always tell when someone lied. 

“How about you?” He asks and her face changes and becomes almost defensive, he wonders if maybe he shouldn’t have asked. 

At first she just shrugs and for once in her life seems to be having trouble finding the right words.  

 _It’s strange to see her like that, normally the two of them aren’t the ones most likely to end up having a conversation because they don’t really have anything in common and she can be kind of a bitch. But they’re all still friends; Emily used to be the one calling Chris if she needed help with her computer or something like that, and then when he’d solved her problem she would offer him something to drink and if her younger brother had been out she’d even play some of his games with Chris, even if that wasn’t her thing and she wasn’t the best at it. Chris had almost forgotten how nice Emily could be._  

“I didn’t think much about it when we were on the mountain, because survival was kind of more important then. But ever since we returned here I haven’t been able to even acknowledge it, it’s ugly and is probably going to leave the biggest scar and besides…” Her eyes darts to the side and settle on watching the raindrops splashing against the window. 

“It reminds me of those… things” She settles on the word “things”, because acknowledging the fact that there were actual monsters is to give in, and Emily isn’t exactly the type to do that. 

“I don’t know Em…” Chris leans a bit forward and smiles slightly as her gaze turn towards him again. 

“Scars are pretty badass, and I’m pretty sure you gave that wendigo a pretty good fight. I don’t think you should be ashamed or scared of that scar, but wear it like you wear your leather jacket, with pride and pure badassness”  

She gives a weak smile and shakes her head at his little speech.  

“You’ve always been kind of strange, but I guess you have a point…” She sounds a bit uncertain and throws a glance down at her shoulder before she lets her hand drop from it. “It’s not going to be easy, but maybe if it grows and becomes a little smaller I won’t hate it so much”  

“That’s the spirit” He exclaims and they exchange smiles. 

“So when are you and Jessica leaving the hospital anyway?” He asks, hoping they’ll stay longer because he really doesn’t want to be left alone in this place. 

“Actually I’m going home tomorrow, Mom got to take some days from work. I can’t wait to finally get away from here” She sighs and notices the way Chris’s gaze seem to drop in disappointment. 

“They’re not letting you go yet?”  

He shakes his head and sighs heavily. “They said they need to keep me for longer, until the wound has healed enough to show any sign of recovery. And you know, it's not every day they have a patient who was nearly eaten.” He had intended to sound more humorous but it just ends up in a bitter tone. 

“Right…”  

Again they fall into silence, this time more awkwardly and with a burning question neither wants to say out loud. Chris however needs to know and before he even manages to give it a second thought it’s out. 

“Have you seen Josh?” The question leaves his mouth too quickly and at first he wonders if he spoke too quietly because Emily doesn’t seem to react. Then she looks up and she shakes her head. 

“I tried to ask some of the doctors about it but they won’t say much, I heard there was something wrong with his face though. Is it because Mike punched him with a gun?” 

He shakes his head. 

“I don’t really know how to explain it and I guess it wouldn’t be fair to the others if I just told you…” He considers it for a bit. Somehow the idea of talking about it to just one person sounds much better than having to explain the whole situation to the whole group, and right now Emily is being a really good listener.  

She doesn’t say anything but seems to know what Chris is going to say anything anyway. 

“Fuck…” Chris mutters and he pulls a hand through his hair. 

“I can say for sure it has nothing to do with Mike hitting him, even though it did do bruise him really bad…”  

Emily snorts, but she lets Chris continue.  

“You know how one of them was Hannah?”  

Emily nods and tries not to look ashamed as her gaze drops. 

“When I was looking for Josh to bring him back and that guy was killed I saw her dragging Josh along, so I made the decision to follow them. Long story short I fell through a lot of holes and when I finally woke up it was the next day, when I made it through the cave I ran into Josh again…” He bites his lip as he tries to find the right words. 

“I – I’m not exactly sure what happened but when I got there; Josh’s face had started changing and he wasn’t himself anymore... I really don't know how it happened, but I guess the spirit of the wendigo was already in him? It doesn't make a lot of sense, I know...” He doesn’t know what to say next and decides to let Emily work the rest out for herself.  

It takes her nothing more than a few seconds and several glances back and forth from his shoulder and face to understand what exactly happened. 

“Oh my god Chris” her hand covers her mouth and she looks genuinely shocked. 

Chris doesn’t really know what to say or do, so he just sits there and watches as she gradually calms down. 

“I guess I see why you didn’t want to talk about it because that is just really fucked up” she admits and Chris can’t help but laugh bitterly. 

A look of sadness and compassion strikes her face and she moves carefully towards Chris to hug in the most careful way he’s ever been hugged, he doesn’t mind though. 

“Thanks” He mutters when it’s over and she’s back in her seat.  

“We both probably needed one” She smiles and Chris agrees.  

The nurse returns shortly after and insists Chris and Emily should return to their rooms, something neither of them bothers to argue with. The exchange good nights before they disappear separate ways.  

Chris doesn’t really sleep the rest of the night but stays in his bed and staring at the rain outside pour down. Absentmindedly he runs a hand along his bandaged shoulder and carefully tries to move the arm he hasn’t been able to move much since the incident. He half expects to not feel anything in it and is surprised when a stinging pain occurs; it travels from his shoulder and all the way down to his fingertips and makes his heart beat fast. The pain isn’t too bad and he tries to move his arm several times, if anything the feeling is sort of thrilling, like an adrenaline shot. However, he still doesn’t want to move it too much because he does want it to heal and moving it too sudden is probably not the best idea, especially since the wound is still healing. The hours pass and soon the sun is rising.  

The day kind of just passes as it usually does with the usual checkups and tests. Emily leaves around twelve and shows up in his room to say goodbye, she gives him another hug and promises that if he has to stay long she’ll definitely come visit; Chris doesn’t quite believe her but holds her to her word. Jessica leaves an hour later and comes to visit him as well before she leaves. They talk a little before she leaves, but not about anything special. She tells him she’ll send Mike to visit him soon, he’s not sure if he believes her either. 

- 

Later that day, around dinner time, Ashely pays him a visit. It’s nice because she doesn’t ask too many questions about what happened but rather talks about how it has been like coming home and going back to school. Apparently, people has been very curious there after they saw the whole thing on TV. 

“Great, now we’re known as the victims from that awful tragedy” Chris mutters ironically after seeing the video of it on Ashley’s phone.  

“It’s not really that bad, people seem to be understanding I guess, but there’s always that condescending look you receive when you walk down the halls” She smiles weakly at him. 

“Can’t wait to go back…” He sighs. 

“It beats staying home and being treated like you’ve gone mad by your parents” Ashley shrugs and leans back into the bed next to him, her eyes cross his free arm but then she quickly darts them to the side so that Chris can’t notice. 

“Oh?” Chris asks. His parents haven’t really gotten to that stage yet because most of the focus goes to his physical state. He doesn’t really think his mom would go there anyway, and his stepdad kind of always assumes things will just fall back into place if you give it time. Most of the times he’s right. Knowing Ashley’s parents enough he has some idea of how things might be at home. 

“The first thing they did was set me up with a shrink. They didn’t even want to me to go back to school at first so I had to talk them in on doing it, which was not easy. At home they always keep acting like there’s something wrong with me and even if I know they’re just trying to help it just makes me feel like I can’t escape it, you know…” She pauses and sighs. Their eyes meet and Chris tries to offer her some sort of comforting smile, he isn’t quite sure he succeeds. 

“I mean I want to forget about it, I’m sure you do too” Something in the pit of his stomach feels almost cold as she says that, but he tries to ignore it as she continues to speak. 

“So why should I have to be reminded of those things constantly? It’s like I’m trapped in this bubble I can’t escape” 

The way she so easily puts it into words reminds Chris how artistic she can be and it makes it hard for him not to smile. 

“Why are you smiling?” Ash gives him a suspicious glance and he just shakes his head. 

“Sorry, it’s just…” He tries not to chuckle at the expression on her face and takes a deep breath before he speaks again. 

“It’s just the way you so perfectly put your words, it just reminds me of something…” he sighs a little at the end and hopes to god that Ashley doesn’t notice, because even after having basically confessed to her and almost blown his brains out for her they’re still on the awkward “still friends” kind of level. It’s okay for now though because Chris doesn’t really think he wants Ashley to know how much he likes her through something like that, and he’d rather wait until things go back to normal before he confesses. He really is going to do it this time. 

“Reminds you of what?”  

He immediately regrets saying that and darts his eyes awkwardly to the side to try to come up with something else to say than “oh just the first time I realized how fucking perfect you are and that I love the way you’re artistic mind works”.  

“You know, that you always know how to express yourself I guess, I think I kind of forgot that you’re such an artist at everything you do” He eventually comes up with, and tries very hard not to add a comment about how perfect she is or that she is the cutest when she’s clueless.  

He isn’t sure if it’s a blush that creeps its way to her face, but even if it is she is too good to hide it.  

“Wow, thanks I guess” she smiles and is about to say something but is interrupted when they hear the door being opened. A doctor that Chris has almost learned the name to, Mrs. Stevenson or something like that, enters with a stern look on his face. He announces that some policemen have arrived to ask Chris a couple of questions about the incident and asks Ashley to leave. Chris has been waiting for this for some time now, surprised that they haven’t been around sooner. But then again, the doctors have been very insistent that besides family and friends he should be left alone. 

He says goodbye to Ashley and she pecks him quickly on the cheek before leaving the room. She promises to come by another day, and this time Chris actually believes it. 

- 

Two policemen show up in his room. One with a camera who asks him if he’s okay with being recorded, he isn’t really sure but agrees anyway, and the other with nothing more than a notebook.  

The questions begin with simple things such as; “When was the last time you remember being with your friends?”, “Why did you separate from you friends?”, “Did you see who killed the stranger?” and further on. He answers as fulfilling as he can manage but tries to leave out the whole wendigo thing, unsure of what he is supposed to say. Finally, they reach the question he has been waiting for. 

“Can you tell us what happened after you separated from your friends? In as much detail as you possibly can please”  

Chris does this easier than he thought he would be able to. He refers to the wendigos as things he wasn’t sure what was and when he tells them about Josh and the things he did, he tries not to put Josh in a bad light. He explains that it wasn’t Josh who bit him, but a one of those things. He tells them Josh had been off his medication and that his face looks the way it does because the things probably did that to him. The lies just becomes easier and easier. 

"And what about those three days you and your friend spent up there? Can you tell us anything about how you managed to survive?"  

Chris has to come to a stop there. He hasn't thought much about this. Not because it hasn't worried him, but because on top of everything else it has sort of become a second priority. Now that he thinks about it he can't remember a damn thing, it's all black like those memories have just been burned out. In the end he has to just tell them that he can't remember and excuse himself with a headache.  

They don’t ask more questions after that and thanks him for his time before they leave.  

- 

As if the day hasn’t been eventful enough, later on he is allowed by the doctors to try and walk around in the halls to see if the shoulder will be fine. They wrap a bandage around his shoulder and he is told to rest his arm there for support. Apparently, it had started bleeding, probably because he had moved it the previous night, so they had to change the bandages first. Chris finds that after not walking for several days, it's harder to get back at it again. The nurses help him up on his feet, and he uses them for support for a while, until he feels like he has enough control by himself. They allow him to walk around a bit in the hospital as long as he doesn’t get in the way of others. 

He takes short walks around the hospital halls and watches the different type of patients and nurses that busy themselves with their own things. It’s kind of nice to be able to see other things than the plain boring walls of his room for a change. 

Chris makes a turn at the end of the hallway and finds more hallways leading to more rooms. Only this hallway is clearly leading to a closed off section and he can't help but wonder if maybe this is where Josh could be. The thought of Josh sends a pang of worry and guilt through him, and he has to take a deep breath and gather himself before he can turn his attention back to the closed off hallway. Chris backs up slightly, half expecting doctors to come running in with another patient. Instead a man almost as tall as him is standing at the entrance looking from left to right. 

“Mr. Washington?” He takes a step closer and almost can’t believe it when the other turns and confirms it. He hasn’t really changed at all; he still has that same haircut where his hair is pushed back with a thick coat of expensive hair products, and the same suit he always wears wherever he goes, like a real businessman. 

“Christopher” Josh’s father greets him and puts up the same smile he always keeps plastered to his face. Chris reciprocates but can’t quite keep up with the same smile.  

“What are you doing here?” He clenches his teeth together as the question leaves his mouth and he tries very hard to keep his voice steady. 

“What do you mean? I’m here to see my son obviously” It’s that sort of reply that makes Chris feel sick to the stomach and it’s hard not to spit back a nasty comment.  

“A week goes by and suddenly *then* you think it's maybe a good plan to show up?” He asks and glares at Josh’s father who is somehow still smiling. 

 _Chris doesn’t hate Josh’s father, not really, but he’s mad and so disappointed that it makes his stomach_ _turn_ _. It wasn’t always like that; they’ve known each other since Chris was young after all. Back then Bob was a great dad and a cool person who used to take him and Josh out for ice_ _cream and_ _teach them things Chris could only wish his own dad could. Back then he didn’t have his step dad, so Bob was the closest thing he had to a dad. As young he had always admired and looked up to the older man._  

 _Things changed when Josh came out to his family. They were always a bit old fashioned, and then Josh's father had their_ _reputation as his first priority sometimes. Wh_ _en Josh told_ _him,_ _his_ _reaction was to throw him out; he was 15 back then. Luckily Josh had Chris and his family to go_ _to and_ _stayed with them for a few months. Eventually his mom convinced his father that Josh should come home and he partly did, living_ _in-between_ _two houses from then on. Chris never minded though, it meant he got to see his best friend more often._  

 _Just as Josh and his father's relationship had gotten on a better path, the incident with the twins happened. After pretty much everyone was convinced they were dead the family slipped apart. Josh's mother became ill with grief and never left her room anymore, his father buried himself in more work. Josh also stopped coming to Chris that year, and they barely spoke for months. Then one day he had started seeming more like Josh, and even though he didn’t come live with Chris anymore, he seemed okay. Of course, that had been very wrong._  

Josh’s father sighs as he meets with Chris’s gaze and he nods. “Yes, I have been very busy trying to fix the damages Joshua has made” He explains as if it’s the easiest thing to understand. 

“So that’s what matters then, not his health? Not what he's been through” Chris keeps his voice cold and he can see with satisfaction that his gaze drops, as if Chris’s words actually matter. 

He sighs again and takes one more step closer to Chris. “Listen to me Christopher” He eyes Chris’s shoulder and it’s something close to concern that crosses his face. “My god what happened to you?”  

Chris’s eyes drop when he hears the concern and he almost regrets being mad, almost… 

“I uhm…” He doesn’t really know what to say, where should he even begin? Is there even an easy way to say “You’re son tried to eat me”?  

Before they get to say much more a nurse appears in the hallway where they’re standing. 

“Mr. Washington I assume?” She asks and eyes the two of them. 

“Yes, right, I’m here to see my son, Josh Washington” The nurse nods and gestures for him to follow her, but then her gaze falls on Chris. 

“Is Mr. Holman coming with you?”  

Before Chris manages to say no and excuse himself back to his room Mr. Washington interrupts him. 

“Actually yes” He looks at Chris with that kind of “don’t argue” look on his face and moves to follow the nurse down the hallway.  

Chris follows him and decides to do as he is told. 

The walk to Josh’s room feels longer than just a walk down the hallway and by each step they close in, the faster his heart beats.  

The nurse stops in front of the door and turns to them with her hands folded together.  

“I’m sure you have been filled in on some of the things that has happened Mr. Washington but I still need to warn you that Josh is currently having problems… remembering quite what happened...” Her eyes dart from Chris to Josh’s father as she struggles finding the right words to use. 

“There’s also his face, we can’t really do anything about that before you’ve signed an agreement as he is currently not able to do so himself”  

As she speaks all Mr. Washington can do is nod and come with a simple “of course” when she is done. Once they’ve agreed, the doors open.  

Chris isn’t really sure what to expect to see inside, but in his head it’s always been the image of Josh tied to a hospital bed like some monster, something he’s pretty sure is just his imagination.  

The room is very similar to his, white plain walls with nothing but a window to the outside to look at. Josh is sitting on the edge of his bed with his head lowered and a nurse is sitting opposite him holding some sort of tube.  

“He is currently being fed through a tube” the nurse now behind them informs them before she leaves the room adding a “the doctor will be here soon” before she disappears. 

The room is very quiet when she leaves and all Chris and Josh’s father can do is stand at the opening and wait in silence, neither of them sure of what to say or do. Chris has been wanting to see Josh ever since they got back, but now that he’s here he kind of wishes he wasn’t. 

The nurse sitting opposite Josh finishes up with the tube and after cleaning off what has spilled he whispers something to Josh and then gets up. 

“We’re all set now so Josh should be ready to see you now… You should keep in mind that he hasn’t seen anyone else than me and the doctors for days now” He says the last part quietly so that Josh can’t hear and then moves to wait in the corner. 

Josh’s father doesn’t seem to move at all so Chris has to eventually step forward. 

 

 

-Josh’s POV- 

Ever since Josh has opened his eyes and found himself in a hospital he’s been paralyzed. Not because he has been injured or anything like that, but simply because he can’t seem to remember who he is and what he’s been doing. The memories sadly returned though; sadly, because they’re not exactly very good. He remembers his name, his age and what has been happening the past year up until this point. He remembers playing a horrible prank on friends who trusted him and the way it backfired, in more ways than one. More importantly Josh remembers sinking his teeth into the neck of the one and only person he had never intended to truly hurt. Even more importantly, he can’t remember what happened next. 

On the second day, when he’s been in this state for a whole night, watching the roof and ignoring everyone around him, he begins to move. It’s an act on impulse because in he’s mind he’s been thinking through the whole situation. Even though his face is bandaged up he tries to speak and move. He asks for Chris when a nurse hears him and clings to her arms in panic. 

“Where is he?” He manages to mumble out through lips that aren’t really there and teeth that seem to be cutting his skin when he moves his mouth, he ignores it though. 

The nurse looks startled and tries her very best to comfort him and not run away. He calms down when he realizes she won’t be of any help and sinks back into the bed, looking for a way to communicate with the people around him without having to talk. The nurse disappears before he can figure it out. 

Josh sighs and waits for the supposed several doctors to come. There is no point in it, they must have looked at him at this point and most likely understood what has happened, to some extent anyway. 

They soon arrive, men and women dressed in white and intense smiles, as if they can barely manage to keep it up once they see what he looks like. 

Then the days pass and he spend them alone, locked up in a room like some monster, and perhaps that’s what he deserves? His father doesn’t bother to show up and when he won’t, there really is no one else. 

He thinks about his friends, wondering what each and one of them has been through, or if they’re even alive. He plays with the thought, figures it probably wouldn’t matter anyone, they would never forgive him. Does he want to be forgiven? Yes. He wants that. He wants Sam to hug him like the great friend she is; wants Mike to hit him friendly in the arm and joke about it; Matt to give him an awkward hug and say it’s okay; Emily to say she forgives him; Jess to hug him and Ashley to kiss him on the cheek and hug him. He wants Chris to hug him too and then to kiss him like it’s no tomorrow, like everything they have means so much more than either of them can ever begin to comprehend. But that’s just a fantasy because if they are alive they will hate him, despise his very being.  

- 

Then comes the day his father is coming to see him. Josh isn’t really prepared for a visit from anyone else, so when he’s finished being fed and he turns to see who he really thought would just be his father, he freezes up. 

Chris his waving his hand awkwardly with a ridiculous “hi”, as if nothing has happened since last time they saw each other.  

Josh can’t react. He wants to do two things; hug Chris and yell at Chris, he does neither. The friend he thought might be dead at this point is in front of him, smiling like an idiot and being absolutely adorable.  

Instead of waving or trying to say hi back he looks to the nurse, the one who has been with him the most and knows how he seems to work at this point.  

“Josh can’t really speak, with his situation and all” she explains and wears a sad sort of look on her face. 

“Oh” Chris says and he looks almost disappointed. 

“Good thing you’re having that surgery then”  

Josh scoff.  

The door opens and a doctor enters. He says his Hello’s and begins to discuss with Josh’s father who hasn’t said a word to his son ever since he’s arrived. Chris just sort of shuffles closer to Josh and without really considering the fact that Josh might not want him to see him, pulls up a chair so that he can face Josh from where he is sitting. 

Josh really does appreciate what he is doing but facing him after everything that happens is too much and he has to look away. How can he look into those eyes and feel anything but guilt? It's too much for him. 

He can’t really think of anything to say, apologizing just seems too stupid when he can’t really find where to begin with that yet. 

The doctor moves toward them not long after and with a simple request that is answered with a nod takes a hold of Josh’s face and carefully turns it so that the wounded side is showing. Bob looks terrified and makes a sound that has Josh lowering his gaze, seeming ashamed. He misses the look of sadness and worry in his father’s eyes, something Chris's eyes doesn’t. And that's enough for Josh right now to finally look Chris in the eyes. Their gazes meet and Josh can't help but feel that familiar flutter he always feels when their eyes meet. He also feels relieved, because he can truly tell now that he isn't alone. 

The doctor explains briefly what they are going to do to fix Josh’s face, things like how to repair most of the damage done.  

“Obviously this will leave a very visible scar, but it is should be much better than this “ 

“Obviously” Robert Washington agrees and throws Josh one last gaze before he moves back to the end of the room with the doctor.  

“When will the surgery be?”  

“As soon as tomorrow if you sign today and then there is some other things I need to speak to you about…” The doctor looks at Chris and gestures for him and Robert to leave the room to talk privately.  

Robert nods at him and leaves without a single word said to his son. 

Josh doesn’t really care though. His relationship to his father has been like this for years, it's not something he feels sad about anymore.  

Instead his attention turns to Chris, who is still sitting by his side. They don’t speak as they sit there but stare down at either their feet or hands. It’s not like it’s very easy to find the right words in their situation. 

“Does it hurt?” He eventually hears Chris carefully ask.  

The question surprises Josh and he makes a sudden turn of his head towards Chris, again revealing the wounded side of his face. 

He shakes his head and wonders for a second if maybe he should try to speak. 

Chris smiles and the smile almost melts Josh's heart. Almost. 

“Good”  

Josh grabs for paper he’s got on the side of the bed and a conveniently placed pen, probably something the nurses had meant for him to communicate with his father. 

He writes down a quick sentence and shows it to Chris. 

 _“How are the others?”_  The writing is terrible, but it should be enough for Chris to understand. 

Chris quickly reads it and seems to think about it for a second, it just makes Josh more nervous. 

“Well, they’re all alive if that’s what you mean” A dark expression crosses his face. 

“Jessica and Emily were badly wounded but they’ve all left the hospital now so it wasn't anything too serious. Mike lost a couple of fingers but recovered faster than others. Ash, Matt and Sam are fine as well; they’re all just trying to move on…” He looks anywhere but at Josh. 

There's a sinking feeling in Josh at this, guilt filling him up. 

“You should know that nothing of what happened to them was your fault, well at least not the worst part…” Chris tries again. Josh really does appreciate it. 

He nods and tries to look like he understands, but really, he knows it's his fault. Chris seems to notice this and takes his hand, squeezing it so carefully Josh can barely feel it at first.   

“Seriously Josh, no one blames you for what those 'things' did. I mean, you didn't even know... ” they lock gazes. 

There is a more comfortable sort of silence between them that lasts for a couple of minutes, until Josh’s hands pull away from Chris’s hold to carefully move along the bandaged shoulder. His eyes full of regret and disgust for himself. He still remembers what he did, still remembers how it felt... 

“Don’t worry too much about it” Chris simply says. 

Josh wants to object, instead he drops his hand and attempts to smile.  

The door to the room opens again and Chris’s nurse sticks her head in and gestures for Chris to leave. 

“Both of you should be getting your medications now, and then rest.” she says and pulls of a smile that isn’t entirely convincing. 

Chris leaves Josh with another smile and a hand on the smaller teen’s shoulder. “Good luck tomorrow, hopefully I’ll get to see you again soon" 

 

- 

After Chris has left Josh is allowed some time by himself before having to take his medications. He is still so shaken up after seeing Chris that he can't actually lay still for even a second. Instead he wanders the room, his thoughts swirling around him like it's a storm in his room. He doesn't feel like himself, but like something that has been sleeping suddenly has been stirred up inside him. 

He finds the bathroom where he knows there is a mirror and watches himself, studying his screwed-up face and nasty teeth; his messed-up eye and the several scratches on his face. It looks better now that the nurses have cleaned and fixed him up, less blood and loose skin. Touching it doesn’t hurt, it burns a little but it doesn’t really hurt. It’s like touching raw meat when his fingers cross the flesh wounds. But at the feeling of it he is suddenly reminded of blood and Chris screaming and the taste of raw meat appears in his mouth. In an instant he is leaned over the toilet, emptying his stomach for whatever could possibly be in there. When it's over Josh sighs and sits back up, wiping his mouth. There's a rumbling in his stomach that makes him feel terrible. Like even though he ate just minutes ago, he is hungry. But it's not the kind of hunger he can just satisfy with just anything, it's the kind that he had back on the mountain. It's almost like the feeling of having his teeth sunk into something wriggling beneath is something he needs on a daily basis... 

Josh eventually manages to get up from the bathroom floor but forgets to flush whatever is floating around in the toilet, and just heads back to his bed. He crawls in under the covers and closes his head, hoping to be able to sleep off the sick feeling in his stomach. There's also a sort of low ringing in his head, and his eyes hurt. It feels better when he is under the covers at least, it's less intense.  

Just when Josh thinks it's going to be okay the door opens. Completely on instinct his eyes fly open and he tenses up as he hears the nurse walk over to the bed. She takes note of the bathroom door that is open before she heads over to his bed. He can hear her heartbeat beat calmly, like she has nothing to be afraid of. And Josh is so scared, because he knows, just knows, that if she pulls off those covers now, he won't be able to stop it. The ringing and the cravings inside of him. 

"Joshua? Are you feeling okay?" Her voice is calm and almost sweet, like she wants to soothe him from whatever pain she thinks he is in.  

 _Please don't..._  

Her hand reaches to grab the covers and that's when he knows it's over.  

Just as the covers pull away and the light hits his eyes he lets out a loud irritated hiss that causes the poor woman to gasp and pull away. But it's already too late. His claws strike her face and cut through the skin along the right side of her cheek. Everything goes red and Josh loses track of what happens next. It's not until he finds himself being dragged off a screaming woman that consciousness returns to him, and by then he knows it's too late. It's a loss and a victory to him. A victory; because she is still alive, and a loss because he is still so very hungry... 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There you go! The kids are finally home and safe, well, more or less. I hope you found this interesting! I really love writing this series and have at least 8 more chapters planned! 
> 
> Thanks for reading and stay tuned for future chapters!  
> Thanks~


	3. Life goes on

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As life goes on Chris and his friends have to learn to cope with everything they have seen. Chris is slowly healing, and his worrying for his best friend is just growing more and more. Can things really get any worse at this point?

**Name:** **** _Ashley_ **** _Annabelle Cahen_ ****  

 **Age:** _18 (turning 19)_  

 **Date:** **** _March 5_ _th_ _, 2015_  

 **Time:** _08:00_ _– 08: 30_ _AM_  

 **State:** **** _Restless, irritable, resistant_  

 **Result:** _No further appointments_  

 

“How are things Ashley?” A slender woman with short dark hair and eyes that seem to be looking right into Ashley’s soul is sitting opposite her. Her legs are crossed and her hands are folded together in her lap. She doesn’t appear to be smiling but her expression is still somewhat pleasant.

“Good” Ashley says and actually means it. 

“That’s good. Tell me, do you still think about what happened on that mountain?”  

Ashley nods silently and her eyes darts to the side. 

“But you’d rather not think about it?”  

She nods again. 

“That is very understandable. When you have been through a traumatic event such as the one you went through. I was given a tape that was recorded when you and your friends returned from the mountain, do you want to talk about that?”  

Ashley shakes her. “No, not really”  

“Alright” The woman nods and leans back in her chair. “Your parents signed all of you up for a meeting with me to talk through things, is there anything you would like to talk about Ashley?”  

Ashley takes a second to think. It’s not like she wants this but she can't exactly fight her parents about it, they decide everything in her life…  

“I don’t really need to talk about anything. I just want to get back to school and focus on my future” She eventually says and it’s the most honest she’s been in a while. 

“I understand that and it’s very good that you see things that way, but can you honestly say the past doesn’t affect your future? What about your friend Josh?”  

“He is not my friend” Ashley hisses through gritted teeth.

“Oh?” The woman asks. 

“Because of what he did, Chris says he did it because he was off his meds but that’s not what it was. Josh knew exactly what he did, even if he was sick… Sick or not, friends don't do things like that.” She turns her gaze away from the woman again and considers for a second to leave without finishing the conversation. 

“So you blame Josh for what happened to you and your friends? Didn’t you say it wasn’t him who did most of the things?” 

Ashley shakes her head. “I can’t…” She tries but just feels a bubble of frustration fill her. 

“I can’t explain anything, a lot of things went down up there but now it’s done and there is nothing anyone can do about it.. Can’t you people just let me move on?” She pushes herself up from where she has been sitting, grabs her bag and heads for the door. Before she leaves she turns to face the woman again. 

“The 30 minutes are up so I’m just going to leave now. Don't expect to see me again.” 

- 

 **Name:** _Mikael Munroe_  

 **Age:** _19 (turning 20)_  

 **Date:** _March 5_ _th_ _, 2015_  

 **Time:** _08:35_ _– 09:05_ _AM_  

 **State:** _Irritable, depressed, open_  

 **Result:** _Further appointments_  

 

“Mikael, welcome”  

“Just call me Mike please, I hate my full name”  

“How so?” The woman asks. 

“I don’t know it just sounds kind of stupid…” Mike shrugs. “Shouldn’t you be asking me more psychological questions or something anyway?”  

“What kind of questions do you think that should be?”  

“I don’t know, I don’t really want to be here anyway”  

“Why not?”  

“Because it’s a waste of time, I’m not mentally ill and besides I have better things to do than talking about my feelings with some stranger” 

The woman leans forward where she is sitting and meets with Mike’s gaze. 

“Almost every human being suffers from some form of mental illness through their life, whether it’s about their fears or something that gnaws at them in the back of their head.”  

“Yeah? Well I guess I’m just special then” Mike nearly spits. It’s so stupid; they didn’t have to go through this the last time things went down on the mountain.  

The woman chuckles and leans back into her chair. “Perhaps”  

“You know we didn’t have to go through this the last time things happened on that mountain. And that time people actually died”  

“Do you think a lot about that?” 

The question catches Mike off guard. “What? No, or I mean yes but not so much that I go around and break things or whatever. I just really wish we hadn't pulled off that prank on Hanna."  

“Hannah Washington, she was Josh’s sister and a friend of yours?”  

Mike nods. “Yeah, she was so shy and nice to everyone. I remember being introduced to her when I was over at Josh’s; she had been baking cookies and was singing loudly at the kitchen when we entered. She was so red when she saw us.” Mike smiles fondly at the memory, but then quickly wipes it away when he remembers where he is. 

“Anyway, I know that things can never be like they were, but that doesn’t mean they can’t be good again. I’ll struggle a bit but I’ll find a way to get over things, eventually...”  

- 

 **Name:** _Matthew_ _Macheain_  

 **Age:** _18 (turning 19)_  

 **Date:** _March 5_ _th_ _, 2015._  

 **Time:** 09:10 – 09:40 

 **State:** _Depressed, anger towards himself_  

 **Result:** _Further appointments with_ _recommended psychiatrist_  

 

“Good morning Matthew” 

“Morning”  

“How are you doing today?”  

Matt shrugs and settles to look at his two feet. 

“Is there anything you would like to talk about today?” 

“Not really, I don’t have anything to say about what happened on that mountain”  

“Do you mind if I ask you a couple of questions then?”  

“I guess not”  

“You and your girlfriend Emilia were together most of the time, do you want to tell me about that?”  

“At first we were getting some luggage she had forgotten, when we returned we found Chris and Ashley all freaking out telling us Josh was dead and that there was a psycho on the mountain with us. I mean I didn’t even know that Josh was behind everything until we got down from the mountain”  

“What happened to you Matt?”  

He looks to both sides and struggles to find the correct words.  

“I uhm, me and Emily we went to get help and we got people to get us. I don’t know how it happened whether it was Josh or something else but the tower we were in, it fell and so much happened after that. I couldn’t help anyone, I tried I really did, but I failed all of them…”  

“You can’t blame yourself Matt, you didn’t mean for any of this to happen”  

“But I could have done more, I could have made a difference”  

- 

 **Name:** _Emilia Thatch_  

 **Age:** _19 (turning 20)_  

 **Date:** _March 5_ _th_ _, 2015_  

 **Time:** _09:45 – 10:10_  

 **State:** _angry, depressed, uncertain, regretting_  

 **Result:** _Further appointments with recommended psychiatrist_  

 

“Welcome Emily”  

“Yeah, thanks I guess… 

“How are you today?”  

“Can’t say I’m fine exactly…”  

“How is your shoulder?”  

She looks at where she knows the scar is and shrugs. “It’s growing, but it’s hard not to hate it to be honest”  

“That is very understandable, physical scars from traumatic events can be reminders of things we would rather not think about”  

Emily nods. “My friend, Chris, told me it looks badass and that I should wear it with pride from the fight I put up. I don’t really feel like a survivor though, I feel more like I lost a lot of me back on that mountain”  

“Chris sounds like he understands some of it. Why do you feel like that, do you think?”  

“You’re the expert, why are you asking me?”  

“Because self-evaluation says more than anything I can ever tell you” 

Emily crosses her arms and leans back. “I don’t really know how to explain it. I don’t feel the same anymore, I cry a lot more and I have nightmares almost every night. I think about those "things", about Josh and about what I can do to make things okay again, but I can’t really seem to find a way to do that. My family helps a lot, but I don’t really think they understand me…”  

“It’s often hard for family and friends to understand what is going on in your head after something like this, the way you are feeling right now is natural for someone who has been through as much as you have. You start feeling angry with yourself and everyone else; it’s very hard to find a way out from these feelings. Do you have anything to distract yourself with when you feel like this?” 

“I tend to study a lot if I feel any of those emotions, it helps me to take my mind off of things”  

- 

 **Name:** _Jessica Cornelia Westshore_  

 **Age:** _18 (turning 19)_  

 **Date:** _March 5_ _th_ _, 2015_  

 **Time:** _10: 15_ _–_ _10:45_  

 **State:** _-_  

 **Result:** _Didn’t show up_  

Briefly about Jessica: 

Is seeing a different psychiatrist and regularly gets help to get herself through the day. She is showing signs of improvement. Jessica returned to school not too long after her release from the hospital but is already missing a lot of classes. She seems to be pushing her friends away. 

-

 **Name:** _Samantha_ _Wackorn_  

 **Age:** _19 turning 20_  

 **Date:** _March 5_ _th_ _, 2015_  

 **Time:** _10:50_ _– 11:_ _20_  

 **State:** _Lost, concerned, depressed, angry_  

 **Result:** _Is_ _seeing her own psychiatrist and therefore has not shown up._  

Briefly about Sam: 

Sam struggles with depression and has not yet returned to school. She seems to be burying her grief and troubles in climbing. According to her father she seems to be improving and will soon be returning to school. It seems she stays in contact with her friends and sometimes even visits them.  

- 

 **Name:** _Christopher Holman_  

 **Age:** _19 (turning 20)_  

 **Date:** _March 5_ _th_ _, 2015_  

 **Time:** _11_ _:_ _2_ _5_ _–_ _11:55_  

 **State:** _Depressed, lost, angry_  

 **Result:** _Further appointments._  

 

“Good morning Christopher” 

Chris nods at her and stares out of a window in the room. 

“Are you uncomfortable being here?” 

“Shouldn’t I be?” 

“That really does depend on you, how are you feeling today? I see your wound is still growing”  

“I had a new operation recently; things didn’t work out the way it should have so I needed to get it fixed again” 

“I see, is it better now?”  

“It’s doesn’t hurt if that’s what you mean, and it’s annoying as hell”  

“Do you want to talk about how you got the wound? You told the investigators the creatures up on the mountain did it”  

“They did, sort of anyway…”  

She leans forward and studies Chris. 

“This is a safe room Chris; I can’t say anything that has been said in this room to anyone else without your consent”  

Chris turns his gaze towards her, considering. 

“I’m not afraid to say it; not really... I just don’t want anything worse to happen to him”  

“To who Chris?”  

“To Josh”  

“What did Josh do?”  

“He wasn’t being himself, something had happened to him. He didn’t mean to do what he did”  

“Do you know what they found in his mouth and in his vomit?” She says it straight forward with not sign of repulsion or disgust in her voice. 

“Human remains, yeah, I know”  

“They also found your blood”  

“If you already know what happened then why are you asking?”  

“I only think I know what happened, you are the one who know Christopher” 

“I don’t blame him for what happened. The things he did to me and Ash were sick and wrong, it's not like I forgive that. But he’s only got me, he needs me.” 

“Sometimes friends will seem like they need you when what they really need is help from someone who can understand them”  

“But I do understand him, more than anyone else, and I am not abandoning him again!” 

 

\--- 

 

A week has passed since Chris was released from the hospital. Life isn’t much different despite everything that has happened. Chris doesn’t go back to school at first, partly because he’d rather not at this point, but also because it wouldn’t really do much good with an arm he can’t use. 

The state that it's in is making life hard. He can't use it for much more than maybe scratch the top of his head every now and then. The last surgery had secured his muscles properly, which meant that soon enough he would be able to take off the bandages. "Soon enough" however, means nothing to Chris anymore. It's all he hears from anyone lately.  

When he’s at home he sits in his room and ponders most of the time, unless his mother and stepfather pull him out to socialize or help do something. The thing is they don’t really know what Chris has been through, so they can’t understand how he feels and even though they try and help him the best they can, it’s never enough. 

He hasn’t been able to see Josh since before the surgery either, which is driving him mad. Once the surgery was over and had been a success Josh had been sent away to a mental institution and that was it. Chris had objected and objected but no one had listened. His parents had tried to convince the ones in charge of Josh that he would be better off with them, but it had been in vain. 

 It doesn’t help that Chris continues to wake up drenched in sweat and shouting for Josh. He blames himself so much for everything that sometimes it physically hurts just to think about his best friend. Chris can't help but wonder what kind of state he is in, if he still can't talk and if there is any part of Josh that hates Chris. 

-  

“Willhelmsberg” announces the robotic voice from the bus, snapping Chris out of his thoughts and telling him to get off on the upcoming station. 

He pulls himself out of his seat and pushes his way out of the bus with a heavy sigh. He thrusts his hands into his jacket pocket and begins to walk once the bus has left; at least the walk home isn’t too long. 

 Ten minutes later he arrives at the front porch of his house and finds his mother sitting on the door step smoking. 

“Hey” He joins her where she’s sitting, looking down at the snow still left from the winter on the ground. 

“Hey, how was the meeting?” She asks and puts her arm around him. 

“Fine, we agreed to schedule a longer session” He shrugs and attempts to smile at her, it just sort of ends up being a result of lips pressed together.  

“That sounds like a good idea”  

Chris nods. “Yeah, anyway it’s kind of cold so I’m heading in now. Is anyone else home?”  

“Isabelle is. She stayed home from school today because she wasn’t feeling very well.” 

“Oh?”  

“She’s catching a cold I think, nothing too serious"  

“Maybe I should go make her something warm; she really likes the hot chocolate I make”  

“You don’t have to restrain yourself, think about your shoulder Chris”  

“Mom, it’s no biggie. I can just do it with me left arm...” He enters the house before she manages to argue. 

It’s an art among others Chris has learned to perfect lately: pushing people away. He used to be able to talk to his parents about anything, especially his mom. Now he hardly talks to her even about normal things and lies more easily than ever. He hates himself for it, but it's much easier than talking about all the things going through the mess that is his head. 

He struggles a little with making the hot chocolate because of his arm but manages to some extent, feeling very proud once the hot liquid is in a large cup with marshmallows and cream on top.  

He knocks on the door before entering Isabelle’s room, knowing more than enough not to just enter a teen’s room no matter what. When a weak voice from inside is heard he opens the door and steps inside. 

The room is dark, the only source of light being the dim light from a lamp by Isabelle’s bed. She’s wrapped up in layers of blankets and only her hair can be seen sticking out. Chris smiles and without a word sits down on the edge of the bed, he puts the cup with the hot drink in on the nightstand by the bed and clears his throat.  

Isabelle groans as he does so and moves vaguely before she pulls the several layers of the blankets away from her face and looks up at Chris with tired eyes. 

“How are you feeling?”  

“Like shit” 

Chris chuckles at the comment and pats her back gently. “Tell me about it”  

“I brought you some hot chocolate if you’re up for it? I even added marshmallows”  

She pushes herself up until she’s sitting with her legs crossed with the layers of blankets still wrapped around her. 

“Thanks, that sounds really good right now” Her nose is red and she’s got large bags under her eyes. She smiles tiredly at him and reaches for the cup.  

“So how did this happen? Yesterday you were all over the place”  

She shrugs as she sips carefully from the hot liquid. “Guess it’s just my turn” 

Chris nods and falls silent for a while, studying the patterns of his step sister’s blankets. 

“Something on your mind?” Isabelle eventually asks when she notices his silence and she puts her cup back on the nightstand. 

“I was just thinking” Chris looks at her and wonders for a second when she had started growing so much.  

“About what?”  

“About you and Johan and where the time went, it feels like only yesterday mom brought you guys over to introduce us. I remember being really excited to meet the guy she had been telling me so much about and his young daughter.”  

“Yeah… I remember wanting to hit you the first couple of days because dad was spending so much time with you and I wasn’t too happy about having a new mom either…” She grins fondly at the memory. 

“That’s right; you were always so mean to me in the beginning”  

“And you were too easy to pick on” 

They share a laugh. 

“Our roles were kind of reversed back then weren’t they?”  

“Yup, you were such a sappy kid and it didn’t really make it better when you introduced me to Josh” Her smile fades a bit when she mentions the name. No one in the house has dared to mention the name much ever since they returned from the hospital, it’s almost like he’s a finished chapter that has suddenly been reopened. 

“Oh yeah, Josh, the slightly sappier kid who always had a comment to everything, it was practically a war between us two and you” He doesn’t stop the conversation to make sure Isabelle gets that it’s okay to talk about Josh, because he doesn’t want to go there. 

“The funniest part is that I used to win a lot over you two nerds” she chuckles and actually sounds like she means it, like she can get over that awkward part.  

“You were a lot stronger than you looked” Chris complains and earns a playful push from Isabelle. They fall silent again after this. 

“Hey Chris?” Isabelle begins after several minutes. 

“Yeah?” 

“Do you think Josh is okay?”  

Chris doesn’t answer in a long time which worries Isabelle, thinking she might have gone too far. 

Eventually however, he opens his mouth to speak. “I don’t think he’s himself right now, he needs time to gather his thoughts and get through everything that’s happened through the past year. Maybe in time, with the right help he might be okay” His voice isn’t shaky and he isn’t uncertain about his answer. 

“Do you miss him?”  

Chris nods. “Of course, if I get to I’ll go see him and talk to him; do you want me to mention you then?”  

Isabelle nods. 

They share a smile and then Chris leans in to place a kiss to the top of her head before he pushes himself up and heads for the door, ignoring the playful grimace on his step sister’s face. 

“Get better Isa, and make sure to drink up” He says before he leaves the room. 

\-- 

Another week passes by slowly. School is still far from in his grasp and there really isn’t much to do at home. He doesn’t have the inspiration to work on a project and he can’t really do much when his arm is just resting uselessly against his chest. Isabelle finally gets better and begins to leave the house again, meaning no pity talks or time-consuming games. His step father, Johan, is barely at home because he’s on a trip around the country entertaining and his mom is usually very busy on her paint projects so he can’t really make them watch him. It’s his own fault anyway, because he told them to go back to work and stop worrying so much about him.  

By the end of the week he is finally called by his physical mentor who is supposed to help him out with exercising out muscles back to health. They discuss about removing the bandages next week and starting sessions, something Chris feels very excited about.  

- 

On Friday he gets a call from Sam asking him to come around and just hang out and so he quickly gets on the nearest bus to her house. Luckily, she doesn’t live too far away and apparently Mike is going to be around as well. Those two are the only ones except for Ashley he’s been keeping much contact with, mainly because they’re the ones he considers his closest friends except for Josh, but also because they’re easier to talk to. The rest of “the gang” mainly talks on a chatroom they have combined, but there hasn’t been much when they’re doing their best trying to move on. Ashley hasn’t been much in contact with Chris either, they haven’t seen each other since the hospital and she’s only called him twice since. He understands she needs her space, but it’s too obvious she is pushing people away and he really doesn’t want her to do that to him. 

The bus stops at a bus stop not far from Sam’s house and he meets Mike on the way.  

“Hey” Mike, who lives a few houses down, says from behind which has him quickly spinning around. 

He throws his hands in the air at Chris’s reaction and chuckles. “Relax, I’m not armed”  

“Dude, never sneak up behind people and then just come with a casual "hey". It startled me”  

“Yeah, clearly” Mike just grins and Chris rolls his eyes as they continue walking. 

“So how have things been?” Mike eventually asks when they’re not far from Sam’s house. Had they just walked faster they could have avoided this. 

Chris shrugs but catches Mike staring at his bandages. 

“Nothing new, I still have to go around with this thing. But I got a call a few days ago, saying next week they might consider taking it off” He sighs at the end of the sentence and meets Mike’s look of concern. 

“Dude, its fine” He adds and moves the arms that is resting against his chest to prove his point. 

“I know, it just looks so much worse then what it probably is. But it's good you're recovering though.” Mike admits. 

Chris nods in understanding and regrets acting like a jerk, he knows his friends are just worried about him. 

“How about your fingers?” He asks in return. 

“Better, or well they look like disgusting stubs but I’m almost used to them by now” He pulls of the gloves he’s been wearing and shows the two half fingers to Chris. They’ve grown into stubs and almost look like smaller fingers without any nails. Chris just nods, he doesn’t really find them gross or anything, they just are what they are.  

They pass a large tree that has grown bigger than all the houses in the neighborhood. Its branches stretch far out and almost seem to be reaching for the sky. It doesn’t have any leaves yet so it’s easy to see the large number of bird nests in it, or rather, crow nests. The tree has been completely taken over by crows that always seem to be shouting out at them when they pass, they’re used to it after years of passing this tree, at least it was fun for Halloween. 

Chris smiles fondly at the memory of the various Halloween traditions’ he’s gone through with Sam, Mike, him and the Washington siblings through the years. 

Finally they reach Sam’s house and doesn’t hesitate to walk right in. Sam’s father is the first one to meet them who is by the entrance getting ready to go out when they arrive. He jumps a little upon seeing them but quickly breaks into a smile. 

“Chris! Mike! Great to see you two again” he greets in a cheery mood. 

They greet him back and they have a short conversation about how they are doing before he has to leave, both feel kind of relieved because the conversation was taking an awkward turn at the ending.  

“Sam is in her room so just go right up” He says before he leaves. 

With no more distractions they head up to the second floor where Sam awaits. 

The door is open upstairs, a low tone of music playing through it. Mike is the first one to move. He knocks on the door and then enters after a "come on in" follows.  

Sam is sitting on the edge of her bed, a notebook in her hands. She looks up at the other two with a gentle smile and a "Hey guys". Even if her smile is genuine, Chris can see the dark circles under her eyes and the light redness under the tip of her nose. He exchanges looks with Mike to see if he can see it too.   

"Hey Sam.." Mike starts and moves inside the room, he sits down next to her and peeks down on the notebook in her hands. A saddened look crosses his eyes. 

Chris follows suit at this and joins them on the other side of Sam. 

The notebook is more like a scrapbook. It's clearly old and from the time Hanna was still alive, because there are several photos of her and Sam on one of the pages. Next to that page a bigger picture of all the Washington siblings cover the page.  

"Sam..." Chris utters sadly and places a hand on her back, moving his hand along it.  

"I know... I shouldn't be looking at this because every time I just start crying. But I just needed to see this today..." Her voice is soggy and tears are forming in her eyes again.  

"They were so happy in that picture" a half sob – half chuckle leaves her mouth and a tear rolls down her cheek. 

"Yeah... They probably were too" Chris smiles sadly and pulls her a little closer to himself.  

Sam lets out a heavy sigh and leans her head on his shoulder, allowing more tears to fall freely down her cheeks. Mike who had been silent leans his head onto her shoulder, silently offering the comfort she seems to need in that moment. 

- 

After a while they decide to try and make the day less depressing and go out. They don’t really have much of a plan and end up marching around the little town nearby, visiting childhood hideouts and playgrounds talking about the past and just reminiscing. 

It's honestly one of the nicest days Chris has had in a while, he even finds himself genuinely smiling at times. With Sam it always feels like home, they have always been close and understands each other, so being with her brings back a lot of joy. With Mike it's also nice, they have a lot of memories together after all. Still, to Chris Mike is and will always be one of those guys he always keeps a certain distance from. It isn't because he doesn’t like him, but they are different in a lot of ways that just sort of make their friendship feel like that. He had never minded it so much when Josh was still around, but now, with just him and Sam it becomes a little clearer. 

The day ends with them chilling in Sam's room and listening to some retro music. Sam tells them it had been one of her favorite things with Beth, and she smiles at the memory.  

Chris has to excuse himself soon and leaves Mike, who says he'll stay a little longer, and Sam. They all exchange small, slightly awkward, hugs before he leaves. 

- 

When Chris gets home it's dark outside. The whole bus ride he has just been dozing off, so he's tired when he finally gets to the doorsteps of his house, He drags his feet up the steps and open the door, revealing a dimmed house inside. Inside his mom is the kitchen talking on her phone in what he can only recognize as a distressed voice. Chris frowns and leaves his coat and shoes in the hallway before entering the room, offering his mom a "whats up?" Look. She only glares back at him with that sort of look that only means he needs to shut up and wait until she's done. Chris nods and feels worry fill him as he sits down. 

The last time she was on the phone like this, she was arguing with the doctors about Chris' operation. It had been successful this time though, so he doubts it could be anything like that this time. 

"Yes I know, I know! But Chris hasn't recovered enough to be doing something like this yet." 

Chris gulps.

"No, of course not!" 

She sighs and places her thumb between her eyes, clearly frustrated. 

"Yes, he is here. But I hardly think it matters since I have already said no"  

Chris eyes her, now more engaged in what is happening. "Mom?" 

She holds up a hand. 

"Yes, I am aware that he is old enough to make decisions like this on his own but I also think that..." 

Before she can finish the sentence, Chris is up from his chair and snaps the phone from her hand. He holds it up to his ear, offering her a determined look. She doesn't seem to bother with argueing and just throws her hands in the air. 

"This is Chris speaking, who is this?" 

The voice on the other side seems surprised to hear him and takes a second before they speak. When they do, Chris can hear a dark female voice. 

"Christopher Holman, this is Jane Clarkman from Riverton mental institution, we are calling you on the behalf of a Josh Washington."  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woooaaah a bit a cliffhanger there~ I am probably going to take a while to finish the next chapter, so sorry about that.  
> Also! Just so you know all the characters have made up second names (except for Mike and Josh) and made up backstories, none of that is canon.  
> Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed~


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